Single Servings Save Me

At the moment, I feel good.

First of all, I kept my calorie intake within 1300 today. Considering how I'd been doing in recent days, that's a huge feat for me! And I'm trying my best not to sugar coat anything--it is what it is. I didn't want to sacrifice anything; I still don't, to be honest. I wanted to eat everything I wanted, satisfy all the cravings that popped up, and then exercise, hoping that I'd be okay. Well, it turns out that of course that method wasn't effective--perhaps "destructive" is a more fitting adjective to describe it. I was eating from 1600~2000 (sometimes a number way beyond 2000) calories and expecting to see a change just because I exercised regularly. Of course I know better. I gotta stop kidding myself and DO THIS.

So, as I mentioned, I DON'T WANT TO sacrifice, but I know that it is necessary to do so. And I accept that. However, at this point in my journey, my perspective on eating is this: a calorie is a calorie is a calorie. I do of course try to incorporate veggies and fruit into my diet, but at the same time I don't want to let go completely of my "pleasure foods." (Yeah yeah yeah, I know that of course my palate can change and I can train my taste buds to desire healthier foods--believe me, I get that, and I understand that.) However, no matter how much I train my taste buds to appreciate fresh veggies and such, I know that I'll never be able to say with certainty, "I don't miss cookies at all." No, not at this point, at least. And no, I'm not talking about healthier versions or "mock desserts," either. I'm talking 'bout the REAL THING, the decadent stuff. I am making a conscious choice to eat the "junk food" too. That means that, if I desire so to eat a slice of cake after dinner, I'll try to make room for it throughout the day. I'll sacrifice in other ways. I'll eat a lighter lunch, I'll choose a lighter dinner. I wanna eat the cake. I wanna eat the foods I crave for, as well as the foods that are good for me. It is not by any means the healthiest approach, but it is a realistic one for me (at this time in my life).

Ah, anyway, this train of thought leads me to the next reason why I'm feeling good at the moment. I believe I've found a tactic that really works for me! I found that when I actually buy single portions (a slice of cake, rather than a whole cake, or one ice cream bar, rather than a box of dozen), I am considerably more successful at maintaining control over what I eat. In other words, I have less room to go crazy with the food. It's undoubtedly an obvious concept, but for some reason I had never really put the idea into action. I had always bought the stuff in bulk, just because it's always a better deal, and I tried to "trust myself" that I'd be able to stick to a single serving. Yeah, right. Not gonna kid myself anymore.

A couple days ago, at the mart, amidst all the "Buy 1, Get 1 Free" signs and great "deals" for boxes of pastry, I managed to buy just one mini doughnut. Thank goodness the nutritional info is displayed next to most bakery products in the mart, or otherwise, I would've chosen some highly damaging stuff. I went home, enjoyed the doughnut, tracked the calories, and watched what I ate for the rest of the day. If I had bought the cheaper BAG of mini doughnuts now, who knows what would've happened? Well, I think I do. I don't know why I even asked. It would've been the same old scenario--of course I would've succumbed and eaten the entire bag in one sitting!

I may sound like a junk food addict, and if I were accused of being one, I'd probably be quick to disagree. Because I do crave healthy foods. I do purposely buy veggies and fruits. But perhaps I AM a junk food addict. I know I have issues with food. I need to sort that out, but I don't want to make it any more complicated than it has to be. As long as I consume less calories and burn more, I'll lose weight. I just need to control the amount that I consume. Seems simple. Much harder than it sounds, but gotta do what I gotta do.